Monday, December 20, 2010

christmas cheer is alive

in Pentagon City.

See, I was just standing in line purchasing stocking stuffers for those family members who are not so great at purchasing stocking stuffers. (I won't say who. That would just be rude. But I'm pretty sure we all know who I'm talking about.)

So. Back to my story. I am standing in line, and the man in front of me bought my items for me!!!

Okay, so really he had spent so much money the store was allowing him to buy extra stuff for free, so technically he didn't buy my stocking stuffers. But I also didn't have to buy them.

So yay for the Christmas Spirit.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

school's out!

Well, not quite. We still have one day left. But at 10:30 today, an announcement was made over the intercom system that, due to snow, school would close at noon.


Except now my students think that they don't have to stay for the rest of class. Or act even remotely attentive.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Dear Delta Airlines,

In the spirit of spreading holiday cheer, I just wanted you to know that I love you with all my heart. Thank you for having a mega-sale on holiday flights. You rock.



I am officially 30, guys. (Don't tell Santa. He might stop coming to my house, and that would be catastrophic.)

All in all, though, turning 30 was pretty fun. My coworkers bought me a cotton candy machine (which I have used more times than I care to admit). My mom bought me a sewing machine (thanks mom!), Katelyn bought me a gingerbread house mold (guess what I'm doing when I go home for Christmas!) and I finished off the evening with Thai food.

PS - Remember how last year I made a list of 30 things I wanted to accomplish before I turned 30? Yeah. Me too. That's all.

Saturday, November 27, 2010


So I'm pretty sure I'm getting a sewing machine for Christmas. I included this on the absurdly long list I made of items that would make me happy (which I sent to my mom, obviously). I pretended that I was going to let her surprise me with which ones she picks. However, after 30 years of being her daughter, I can now guess (with about 95% accuracy) which items she will buy me. (Sorry, mom. You're kind of predictable. But don't worry, I'm super excited about the sewing machine.)

I have big plans for this sewing machine. These plans may or may not involve Project Runway-type projects. Prepare to be amazed.

(I may have practiced just a little with Katelyn's sewing machine. And I may have almost broken it. But I think I have the kinks worked out. I'm ready.)

diy: how to make the best thanksgiving rolls ever

Step 1: Make Mom's homemade roll dough.

Step 2: Melt an entire stick of butter in the bottom of a bundt pan.

Step 3: Cut out the rolls and place them in the bundt pan so that they swim in butter. (It's fun for them.)

Step 4: Let the rolls rise. As they rise, they will absorb the butter (hence absorb delicousness)

Step 5: Bake at 375 for 12-15 minutes.

Step 6: Consume. Go to the gym. Consume some more. Go for a run.

Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Dear Ear Doctor,

(otherwise known as Katie's husband),

When you first told me that Q-tips are evil, I kind of thought you were pulling my leg. Seriously. I didn't think it was possible for someone who loves ears so much (as you apparently do) could not love Q-tips. Bizarre.

But then, suddenly, I couldn't hear out of my left ear. And I completely blame Q-tips. Dang. Turns out you were right. I will never again doubt you or your audiological skills.

All the best,

PS - Don't worry, thanks to a couple bottles of debrox drops I can hear again. Crisis averted!

Thursday, October 21, 2010


So, in case anyone was wondering, I can't seem to keep my eyes open these days.

I'm not tired, they just won't stay open. It's something neurological, apparently. So I can't drive. I sometimes run into things when I'm walking. My students think I'm weird because sometimes my eyes close when I'm answering their questions.

But don't worry, I have lots of friends who have all offered to drive me around, cook for me (okay, maybe I can cook for myself, but if anyone offered, I'd certainly accept) and help me out with whatever else I need. They're great.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

overheard in the faculty room

So sometimes, if a kid's schedule changes, all of his grades get deleted from my online gradebook. (Annoying for me. Sometimes good for the kid. Sometimes not so good for the kid.)

So theoretically, if a student wants a fresh start, all he has to do is "lose" all of his old papers and change his entire schedule. How delightful.

We were obviously discussing this phenomena in the faculty room (because we had run out of gossip). And the math teacher pipes in:

So, if a student wants all of his grades erased, really, all he has to do is go find that room where we keep the internet....

Saturday, October 09, 2010

3-day weekend

It was blissful.

I slept.

I read.

I organized my closet. (Still working on that one.)

I did not grade a single paper. I did not do anything I didn't really want to do.

Back to work tomorrow.

Sunday, October 03, 2010

i moved!!!

After a month of sleeping on the floor, I have finally moved into a permanent apartment! It is delightful.

In case anyone was wondering, Katelyn and I have excellent style. Since my camera cord was lost in the move (along with my flat iron and curling iron) you will have to come visit to see what it looks like. But please wait until I have time to replace my flat iron. I am having some bad hair days recently. (How embarrassing...)

But the great news is, only two weeks left until my foot will return to full functionality. I am looking forward to my inaugural run (and inaugural bike ride). Everyone's invited. It's going to be a huge party.

Sunday, September 26, 2010


I am not really sure why spending 30 hours in a car with no shower and no sleep is fun, but it really is. Except this year, I was not allowed to run because of my broken foot. Jack took my place. He was way faster than I would have been. But I came along anyway as van chauffeur/entertainer extraordinaire. I don't want to brag or anything, but I think I was a perfect fit for the job.

Except for when I thought that I had dropped the car keys in the porta-potty. I can laugh now, but I was less than amused when I was digging around on my desperate search. (Don't worry, the keys were found safe and sound under another team's van.) And I totally secured my prize as "most dedicated team member". Which makes it totally worth it. (Right?)

Sunday, September 19, 2010

did you hear?

I broke my foot.

Which wouldn't be so bad if the weather out here weren't perfect for running and frolicking in the great outdoors. And if the Ragnar Relay weren't this weekend, and if my marathon weren't coming up in 6 weeks.

Needless to say, I am not running Ragnar. Even though I am the team captain. BUT my new coworker is probably running in my place, which makes me feel good that I could make the new guy feel welcome. Yippee.

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

first day

We went back to school today (finally). As wonderful as my summer was, it was great to be back discussing really important things like exactly how old Bill Clinton is (trust me, it relates) to why you can't win a track meet if you run in the wrong direction.

My juniors are delightful. So delightful, in fact, that even the most crotchety teachers can only think of good things to say about them. And when you can get Adam the history teacher to say good things about you, you have won a very hard-fought battle. (Again, you're going to have to trust me on this one.)

Thursday, September 02, 2010

just in case

Just in case you ever wondered what teachers do before school starts, I will tell you.

First, we sit through hours of meetings that have no known purpose.

Then, just as we think we are going to die of boredom, we start playing pranks on one another. And suddenly, life is much better.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

sad news

Okay, not only is this my last week of summer, but I also learned some terrible news today.

My copy of Mockingjay is not even shipping until the 30th!!! The copy that I pre-ordered so that I would have it the day it came out!!

(Okay, so maybe I pre-ordered because it was half price. But still!)

Life is hard.

Monday, August 23, 2010

holy cow

I only have one week of summer left.


Then I have to actually get up in the mornings. And go to work. And leave my house every day! Not sure what I'm going to do with myself.

But until then, I have been thoroughly enjoying the every last bit of summer by moving to Virginia, buying a bike, spending time at the pool, and convincing my former roommate that it might be time for her to pay the utility bill. (We're still working on that last one.)

Sunday, August 15, 2010


Moving forces you to take inventory of the things you own, whether you like it or not.

Turns out my possessions fall into the following categories:

32% clothing
32% furniture
32% books
3% sports/athletic/outdoor gear (which will increase when I buy my new road bike this week)
1% everything else

I have my priorities, okay?

Friday, August 13, 2010


I just invited a bunch of people over for a barbecue Sunday night.

What they don't know is that Sunday also happens to be the day that my furniture will need to be moved from my room to the basement.

I'm sneaky.

Sunday, August 08, 2010

you are SOOOO welcome

Hey, did you guys know that you can now pay your tithing using your bank's online billpay?

It's true. You can.

They announced this in my ward's Relief Society a few weeks ago. Out of the 200 women sitting in RS that week, I think I was the only person listening.

I might have started clapping.

But ever since then, every single person I have mentioned this to acts shocked. They all want to know where on earth I learned such a thing.

(In relief society, obviously. The same Relief Society that they were sitting in. (I think this might tell us something interesting about Relief Society "announcement time". Maybe. I'm just saying...))

And then they want to hug me. And be my best friend. It's almost like I invented it myself. (I didn't. I just know how to do it. And now I am exploiting it so that people will like me.)

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

dear bethany,

I made giant home-made oreos the other day. Thought of you. Wish you were here.


3 weeks

Only 3 weeks of summer left. I can't say I'm ready for it to end.

But tomorrow I leave for Nashville to spend the weekend playing with Bexie and her kids. And hopefully taking in some good country music.

And then I get to dog-sit for my coworker. He thinks I'm doing him a huge favor, but really I get to spend 5 days playing with his dog, eating his food, and watching his TV (and scooping up a little bit of dog turd along the way). (He thinks I need to be a live-in dog sitter. People around here love their dogs. Fine by me.)

And everybody keep your fingers crossed that I will find a place to live by the 15th. Please, I would rather not sleep in my car.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Right now....

I am wishing summer would move just a little bit slower. I am really enjoying this whole no work and all play thing. Just over a month left.

I am looking forward to a trip to the rodeo this weekend. Nothing beats bull riding, mutton busting, and fair food.

On a more serious note, I am making steps towards buying both a bike and a house. I think the house is a slightly bigger deal than a bike, but both are stressful. I have a hard time with large purchases, in case you didn't know. But if I'm ever going to do a triathlon, I need a bike. And if I'm ever going to feel like a real grown-up, I need a house. (or condo. whatever.)

Sunday, July 18, 2010


I have recently been informed that I never talk about my brother. Apparently a few people thought I didn't have one.

I do. I like him.

We were totally partners in crime when we were little. Then I turned into a poodle, and as it turns out, poodles do not make the best partners in crime.

But now he has what might be the cutest child on the planet.

Monday, June 14, 2010


Summer is finally here. All I can say is, it's a good thing May went by so fast. Otherwise I would have been royally annoyed by the fact that I was still in school on June 11. As it were, I thought it was still May, and being in school during the month of May is nothing to be annoyed by.

I am already on my summer schedule of staying up until 3 am. I am not, however, sleeping this summer away. Instead, I have all kinds of plans.

I am going to become a better tennis player. I have been practicing for a few weeks with my coworkers after school, and am already light years ahead of where I was before. Which still does not mean that I am particularly good, but I'm getting there.

I am going to read a LOT of books. I've already finished a couple, and started a new one called The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake. So far, so good.

I am going to start a new blog. One all about teaching. It's already started, actually, but is not ready for public viewing. (Don't worry, this one is not going anywhere.)

I will find a new item to grill every week. Today it was strawberry shortcake. It is true that everything tastes better off the grill.

Best of all, I am going to spend as much time as possible out in the sunshine. (Most likely reading books in the sunshine.)

Oh. And I am not going to hate girl's camp. I'm convinced of it.

Sunday, June 06, 2010

Dear Bexar,

How am I supposed to be your favorite sister when you never answer your phone?


Saturday, June 05, 2010

okay, okay. here i am.

Just in case you were wondering, I am still alive. And doing well, thank you very much. My days are filling up nicely, which means that I will thoroughly enjoy the end of the school year. (Which is coming up in exactly 5 days. Not that I'm counting....)

Weekly routine:
Monday: Tutoring, followed by the latest episode of The Bachelorette and grilling anything and everything that can be grilled. (bananas, pineapple, stuffed peppers, corn, and the list goes on.)

Tuesday: Tennis Tuesday! I am getting SO good. (As long as you're okay with having a flexible definition of "good".)

Wednesday: more tutoring and being Ashley's personal shopper.

Thursday: more tutoring

Friday: take a nap.

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

dearest may,

No offense, but I don't really remember much about you.

I hope I get along a little better with June.


Friday, May 21, 2010

dear ashley,

your job sucks.

but i still love you.

your favorite sister,

Sunday, May 16, 2010

books. (surprise, surprise)

Now that I am officially done teaching seniors I have all kinds of time on my hands. Which means a book order from Amazon.

I am currently reading The Space Between Us, which is taking me forever. (Mainly because it's not as great as I want it to be. Okay, but not great.)

So I went ahead and ordered Physics of the Impossible (physics that could theoretically explain invisibility cloaks and other such things. awesome.) Ella Minnow Pea (I have no idea what this book is about, but it's been on my amazon wish list for forever) and Let the Great World Spin (I hear it's excellent. I hope it doesn't disappoint.)

Anyone have any other recommendations? It seems I've hit a rut.

Sunday, May 09, 2010

good news bad news

Okay, so I have some good news and I have some bad news.

Bad news: I am not going to Singapore, Vietnam, and Indonesia this summer like I had planned.

Good news: I am going go Singapore, Vietnam, and Indonesia next summer! Why? Because I think I can get my school to pay for it. Sometimes they're nice like that.

Bad news: I do not have a summer job.

Good news: I have been tutoring for the past few months, which pays WAY better than summer school does and is tax-free. So don't you worry, I can still afford to go to Italy and Greece this summer. And visit Bexar. And spend a lot of time reading books by the pool.

Bad news: I am out of bad news. Turns out being me is pretty easy these days.

Sunday, May 02, 2010


I finally found my camera cord in a trunk of clothes.
The race ended on the beach at Dana Point. We would have been smiling even if it had ended in a junkyard. We were just happy to see each other.

And Ashley and January made friends with a guy named Johann. He liked us because we filled his water bottle for him so he wouldn't die. What can I say, we are good people.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

my pants ARE on fire

You're right. I said I would post pictures, and I have not.

I can't find my camera cord. I'm still looking.

But in the meantime, if you want to read a really depressing book, read The Weight of Heaven. So well written but seriously so depressing. And I rarely find books depressing. Sad, yes. Depressing, no.

If you want to read a really excellent book, read Sold. It's about a girl who is sold into prostitution, so you would think that it would be depressing, but it's not. It is excellent. Love it.

The end.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

socal ragnar

For those of you who were wondering, california was lots of fun.

even though our team captain did not like me, ashley was there, so how could i NOT have fun? seriously.

i did very little sleeping, lots of running, and lots of sister time. exactly what i needed out of my weekend.

i will post pictures tomorrow. i promise.

teenagers are funny

In the middle of class last week, (while I was wearing my favorite, very large necklace) one of my students raised his hand:

"Ms. Reed, what would happen if you fell over and couldn't get up because your necklace was too heavy?"

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

good news, guys

in case you were worried that i might be running out of things to do, i am flying to california next weekend to run ragnar with ashley. luckily my principal thinks running is awesome and will give me a day off of school. sometimes i love him.

Monday, April 12, 2010

born to run

has anyone read it? if not, you should. it'll make you love running.

now, maybe this means that i'm easily swayed, but after reading it all day long saturday (while sitting on my porch basking in the sun) i decided to get up and run 8 miles. it turned out to be the fastest 8 miles i have ever run. (i know because i have the awesome garmin wristwatch. it told me how fast i was. i wanted to hug it.)

then today, after my regular run, i ran 1.5 miles barefoot through the grass. it just might have loved that 1.5 miles more than any other 1.5 miles i've ever run.

now, i know i say this a lot, but this book just might change your life. seriously.

Sunday, April 04, 2010

2010 books

As you know, when I turned 29, I made a list of 30 things I wanted to accomplish before I turn 30, including reading at least 30 books this year. Easy.

So far I have read:
1. Into Thin Air
2. Rules of Survival (kind of heartbreaking)
3. The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
4. The Girl who Played with Fire
5. I am the Messenger (one of my favorite books EVER)
6. Ender's Game (also one of my favorite books ever)
7. The Maze Runner
8. Eat, Pray, Love (delightful)
9. The Glass Castle (fantastic)
10. Left Behind (surprisingly good, considering it's a "Christian Lit" novel. It's the only book my co-worker has read cover to cover, so I obviously had to read it out of curiosity)
11. The Great Gatsby (again)
12. Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet (not as good as I had wanted it to be)
13. Catching Fire? (maybe... I can't remember when I read this one)

up next:
Born to Run. Everybody at work has been talking about it, and I feel left out. Especially since I run. Supposedly this book says it's okay (in fact, preferable) to not spend a lot of money on running shoes, which is awesome because, let's face it, I don't like spending a lot of money on anything.


Besides the fact that it snowed, Utah was awesome.

I played with Violet every day, securing my spot as favorite aunt. Brandon thinks that she loves me more than she loves him, which might be true. I mean, I don't want to brag or anything, but I am a pretty awesome aunt.

I consumed all-you-can-eat french toast from Magelby's Fresh, had dinner with some old friends, and took a nap pretty much every day.


For those of you who read Ashley's blog, "extremely high grooming standards" is not a downfall.

And yes, having a poodle as your best friend is SO totally worth it.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010


So my list of places to visit this summer keeps growing.

Now Ashley and I want to go to Sicily and Greece.

And then from there I was thinking of meeting up with Emily to visit Veitnam, Singapore, and Indonesia.

And then from there I might come home. We'll see how things go.

Considering I do not have a summer job, I have no idea how this is going to be paid for. JCrew probably won't pay me enough to cover the whole trip, but might make me the well-dressed world traveler ever. (Good thing I have my priorities in line, right?) Thankfully, tutoring helps a lot, and I currently have two tutoring jobs.

I'm pretty sure this summer is my 30th birthday present to myself. No summer school. Lots of sunshine and happiness, and lots of trips. Brilliant.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

so rise, and shine....

Today, I got a phone call from our stake's girl's camp director. I'm pretty sure I am going to be a leader this year. I am currently flipping back and forth between excitement and dread....


Today, we had our annual "Beyond the Books" day at school, during which we held no classes and instead had heartfelt discussions about life. It was awesome. Although it kind of freaked out our Chinese exchange students when all the sophomore girls started crying during a particularly emotional break-out session. Apparently in China, people don't talk about their feelings. They told me they would way rather be in Physics class.

At the end of the day, we showed the movie Gossip to our Senior girls. It might have jumped up to my favorite movie of all time.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

remember when....

Hey, remember when I used to be an awesome blogger? Then I stopped being quite so awesome. I like to think it's because I got a life, so I no longer have to blog to make myself feel important. That may or may not be true, but it's what I tell myself.

At any rate, I recently promised a co-worker of mine that if, at some point in his life, his liver were to fail, I would be happy to share mine with him. (He is convinced I have an awesome liver. Don't ask how these conversations get started.) The next day, I stole his parking spot and reminded him that I have a greed to share my liver, so he owes me. This is awesome mostly because he can never get mad at me. Ever. (And I probably won't ever actually have to give him my liver.)

Wednesday, March 03, 2010

this summer

i'm pretty sure i'm taking a trip to indonesia.

(go ahead, be jealous. everyone else is.)

Tuesday, March 02, 2010


For somebody who owns so many clothes, i find it ironic that i do not own a single long-sleeved white tshirt.

Friday, February 26, 2010


One of the math teachers at our school received the following email from a student two days after a major project was due:

Dear Mr. Math Teacher,

I have finished my project. I would send it to you, but my internet is down, so I will have to give it to you tomorrow.

Your Favorite (and smartest) math student

Sunday, February 21, 2010


Last weekend, after a week of being snowed in, we decided to head up to New York City. It was awesome.

We spent a lot of time in Times Square

Bought cheesy I Love NY t-shirts

Ate some really good food

and went to the top of the Empire State Building. (Since it was Valentine's day and all. Meg Ryan was not there. Neither was Tom Hanks. Such a let-down.)

things i love:

Since it was valentines day and all....

Mostly I just love the snow. Simply because I had 6 snow days that (we have been told in secret) we will not have to make up at the end of the year.

I also love that my mom sent me a valentines card with the word "ass" on it. Hehe. Thanks, mom!

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Dear Mabel,

Let's make a deal. I'll visit you if you visit me.

I'll take you to the Zoo and the National Children's Museum and we can have a picnic by the river. It'll be awesome.

Let me know what you think.


PS - Don't let your mom bribe you. You can ask for me to come visit any time.

Monday, February 08, 2010

good news

I don't have school today, because DC doesn't know how to plow streets. Reason #452 I am in love with DC.

We also don't have school tomorrow.

And we're supposed to get more snow tomorrow night.

Bad news: I was supposed to go sledding today, but everyone bailed. We're going bowling instead. I have lame friends. (I like them anyway)

Thursday, February 04, 2010


So one of my students is missing two weeks of class to kayak in Costa Rica.

Her parents made me cupcakes to make up for it.

They are the best cupcakes I have ever eaten in my life. I stole one of her math teacher's cupcakes. He doesn't know what he's missing out on.

Sunday, January 31, 2010


I woke up Saturday morning, planning to go for a long run. Instead, I looked outside to find lots of snow on the ground. Which meant I didn't change out of my pajamas all weekend. Glorious.

The only thing that would have made it more glorious would be for the snow to come on Monday. There's nothing better than a day off of school.

But, lest you think I was lazy all weekend, I did finish a book (Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet), start and finish a second book (The Rules of Survival) and start a third book (Cutting for Stone). So far, Cutting for Stone is my favorite of the three.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010


I have this student. His name is Anthony. But under the "preferred names" section of my attendance, it says "Anth". So I've been calling him Anth for 4 months now.

He just told me yesterday that he actually goes by "Ant". (Seriously.) And that the whole class has been laughing at me every time I call him "Anth." (Meaning every day.)

If you want my opinion, they should be laughing at him for calling himself "Ant".

Wednesday, January 20, 2010


I also discovered fabulous post-holiday sales this weekend. For less than $100, I was able to purchase:

  • a gray pencil skirt (Banana Republic)
  • a sweater
  • a pair of corduroy pants
  • a black shirt dress
  • 2 new bottles of lip gloss
  • bronzer
  • a pair of tights
  • a pair of pajamas
  • 3 bottles of shampoo and conditioner (usually $20 each)
  • 2 new camisoles
And while I admit that I probably didn't need any of this, I'm really just doing my part to help the economy. Plus, they're really pretty.


I discovered an all-you-can-eat sushi buffet this weekend. All the sushi I could handle for just $12. My life is complete.

ps - I usually hate buffets, mostly because they usually mean lots of mediocre food. This one was fantastic. And included fried bananas. Like I said, my life is complete.

Monday, January 11, 2010

book reviews (for shady)

The Great Gatsby: Interesting novel and much more fun to read than I remembered, but nothing that I would swoon over.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo: Kind of graphic in parts, but very gripping. I couldn't put it down and kept reading until 5 am when I got too scared to keep going.

Into Thin Air: Augh. Jon Krakauer is infuriatingly self-centered. But he writes good books, so what can you do?

Ender's Game: Heartbreaking. Please read it.

Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet: Loving it so far.

up next:

The Writing Life, by Annie Dillard. I read a collection of her short stories years ago, and her writing is enchanting.

Left Behind: A co-worker of mine hates reading, and this is the only book he has ever in his life finished. He read the entire series. I'm intrigued.

Black like Me: I've heard really good things about this one.

Sunday, January 03, 2010

big events of 2009

1. I loved every stinking book I read this summer. Usually I order 4 books at a time and read the first chapter of each until I find one that grabs me. For some reason, this year I couldn't decide which to start with because they were all so awesome. That in itself makes 2009 a successful year.

2. Dubai. Rome.

3. Skiing. I am a total pansy, but still love it with all my heart.

4. As it turns out, I am totally the best Santa ever. My kids are going to be SO lucky to have me around.

5. My first half-marathon. This year it's my goal to actually follow a training schedule for one of these. Just to see if it improves my time at all.

6. Ragnar. Quite possibly the best two days of the year.

7. Starting a successful book club. This month is The Great Gatsby, which I have already finished (and thoroughly enjoyed) and next month is Ender's Game, which I have started and am already in love with. Sci-fi is not my typical genre, but this one is heartwrenching. I'm already in love with Ender.

Saturday, January 02, 2010

merry christmas to me!

Today I received a $900 check in the mail from the State of Texas.

I like 2010 already.

the girl with the dragon tattoo

Is terrifying. I didn't want to get out of bed to go to the bathroom for fear that somebody would jump out and smack me in the head with a golf club.

(Nobody smacked me in the head with a golf club. But it was still scary.)