Sunday, April 23, 2006

they learn

My students are finally learning that sometimes, I can be more stubborn than they ever thought imaginable.

Tony: Ms. Reed, I need you to print out a new grade report for me.
Me: You do, huh? Well, I'm pretty sure I gave you one yesterday.
Tony: Yeah, but I turned in a late assignment, so that should have brought my grade up.
Me: You sure did. Good for you.
Tony: Right. So, I need.... Forget it. You're not going to budge. I'm wasting my time.

If only the rest of them would pick up on this.

Friday, April 21, 2006

humiliating

I am officially the weakest person in my physics class. And I'm the teacher. We were talking about the physics principles behind karate chops, so I brought in some boards to break, thinking that I would impress them with my ability to smash a stack of boards with my bare fist. Because this website that I found told me I could. And I trusted it.

My hand hurts. And I couldn't even break one board. But every student in the class who tried was able to break at least one. I think I need to start working out.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

count your many blessings

I've been pretty happy with my life these days. In fact, I've been kind of hard-pressed to find anything to complain about at all. I have a job that I love, mainly because it allows me to be the boss of everyone, (even if they are all 16 years old), and my own office (classroom). But the advice guy on the easy listening radio station (who recently replaced Delilah, hallelujah), said that people are the happiest when they make a list of three things they are thankful for every day. So I have decided to take his advice, because he seems to have all the answers. And I decided that even if I count each family member individually, and count the card my sister sent me as two blessings (because it was just that funny), soon enough I'll have to start finding more creative reasons to be grateful. So this is what I came up with.

I am thankful that I am no longer 16 years old and still in the "I'm trying to fit in by acting 'cool' while still establishing my individuality" phase. Because this phase usually involves (if you're male) showing up at prom in a white suit with black pinstripes, (which by the way nobody really thought was attractive at all).

I am also thankful that I am no longer 16 and am now smart enough to not fall for men's deceptive charm. Oh, wait. Never mind, I still fall for that. Every time. But it's been several months since any man has tried to charm me, so I have convinced myself that I'm over that phase. And for that, I am eternally grateful. (No, I have no problem with being lulled into a carnal security. Yes, all is well in Zion.)

And finally, I am grateful for the fact that I am not a 16-year-old boy. Especially the 16-year-old boy who asked the hot girl to prom, and asked her for no reason besides the fact that she is hot, and proceeded to spend the evening holding her purse and flowers while she simultaneously did her best "I'm crossing my arms and turning away from you so that you will know just how much I don't want to be here wtih you" body langugage while scanning the room for anyone to talk to that was not her date.

So yeah. My life is way better than I ever thought.

Monday, April 10, 2006

prom '06

I agreed to chapherone our school's Junior/Senior prom this weekend, partly to be helpful, but mainly because I was curious to see what the 2006 prom styles were like. I'm pretty sure the theme this year was "hot". And not hot as in "wow, all the boys will think I look so hot and will all want to date me", (although this was inevitably the look each girl was going for), but hot as in hot pink, green, yellow, blue, orange, and turquoise, not only on their dresses, but eyes and lips as well.

And I'm pretty sure that dancing has changed a bit since I was in high school. (Not that I ever danced in high school, but that's besides the point. I watched a lot of it, so that totally counts.) The moves I witnessed Saturday night mainly involved feet planted firmly on the floor, sway your hips, swing one arm, eyes on your feet. (Just in case the swaying knocks you off balance, maybe?) And if the music gets really "hopping', jump twice, return to the sway. And people wonder why I don't love to dance. Huh.

Now, it turns out that in Georgia, while line-dancing to country music is not considered "cool", it is perfectly acceptable to line dance to a rap song. And it also turns out that boys who act too tough to get excited about making rock candy in class are not too tough to dance a bunny-hop type line dance, as long as it's to the tune of a rap song. There are some things I will never understand.

All-in-all, everyone had a good time. The girls pranced around taking as many pictures as humanly possible, hiding in the bathroom to discuss the evening with their friends, while the boys followed them around carrying purses, flowers, and talking on their cell phones.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Reason # 4827

Yet one more reason I LOVE my job.

I wore a pair of lime-green pants to school today. A rather bold move on my part, but I love them. And apparently, so did my students. I have never received more compliments on an item of clothing. Teenagers can be so flattering. And my physics students now think I have "so much style".

Even though we did turn off the lights during two of my classes, just to make sure they don't really glow in the dark.

And they love my new dark-brown hair color.

Yup. Teenagers are great.