traffic patrol

My sister and I went on a pre-shopping excursion yesterday. You see, my mom is taking us shopping tomorrow, but what with her school and orthodontist appointment and boot scootin' boogie dance practice, we were afraid we just wouldn't have enough shopping time. Because you have to browse the sales, try on outfits, convince my mom that the clothes we want are cute enough and on-sale enough to buy. It's really a pretty extensive process, and takes a lot of practice before the whole shopping process is really mastered.

So we finished our browsing and were headed home for a late dinner with my parents. But we pulled into our neighborhood, and our neighbor jumped right in front of our car. Apparently, he had appointed himself Falling Brook's very own traffic cop. Which, when you think about it, is really very sweet of him. And what's even sweeter is that he put the good of the community ahead of his own life. I mean, I know very few people who would jump in front of a moving vehicle just to protect their neighborhood from unwelcome hoodlums like myself. So there he was, arms flailing, pounding the hood, shouting BACK UP! GET OUT! YOU CAN'T COME IN HERE! BACK UP!!

Excuse me? I can't come into my own neighborhood? Actually, sir, I'm pretty sure I can. And I'm pretty sure I'm going to. You, my friend, are more than welcome to stand in the road all night. I won't even get mad at you for pounding on my hood. But, just so you know, I'm not backing down. I will wait patiently until you get out of my way, and then I'm going home. (I can be amazingly stubborn when I want to.) So, I put my little car into park and waited. Which didn't go over so well. Nor did the fact that I found the situation incredibly humorous. THIS ISN'T FUNNY! YOU CAN'T COME IN HERE!!! No, I'm sorry, sir, but that's where you're wrong. This is funny. This is very, very funny. So we had a stand-off right there. I won. He finally gave up and moved out of my way. He did, however take down my license plate number so that he could call the cops and have them tell him that I was doing nothing illegal, but that it just might be illegal (if not very STUPID) to jump in front of a moving vehicle and pound on its hood.

I'm glad my neighborhood is safe in the hands of men like him.