I was accused this past weekend of living in a fantasy world. A friend of mine expressed his concern that I live in my own little make-believe dreamland, a place where everything is happy and nobody has to do anything they don't like. At the time, I was more amused than insulted, mainly just because I've always considered myself a fairly practical person. I'm happy probably ninety-nine percent of the time, but that doesn't necessarily mean I'm not living inside of reality. It shouldn't, anyway.
The more I thought about it, though, the more I realized that he was right. Yes, I'll admit it, Derek was right. I've never really done anything that I didn't enjoy. I've been bombarded my entire life with the ideas that I should find a career that I love, and that I should never, ever settle. And apparently it sank in, because I fully subscribe to these beliefs. So, I've always done what I wanted to. I majored in Engineering because that's what I wanted to do. I went to grad school because I wanted to. And now I'm going to teach high school, also because I want to. The idea that I might have to enter a new career, relationship, or locale that I didn't like has never crossed my mind. It's just never been an option for me.
Now, don't get me wrong. Everything I've done hasn't been all sunshine and rainbows. There have been elements of everything that I've disliked. I disliked doing my senior project, but knew that it was necessary to get my degree, so I did it anyway. I hate, hate, HATE grading papers, but that's part of being a teacher, so I'll do it. It's not a matter of refusing to do anything that isn't fun and exciting, but rather a matter of making sure that I like where I am and what I'm doing with my life. It's figuring out what you love, and not being afraid to make it happen. Maybe that is a dreamland. But it's one that I like, and one that I'm not ready to leave any time soon.
Friday, March 18, 2005
just call me tinkerbell
Posted by poodle at 3:54 PM
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2 comments:
No, Derek isn't right. You never have to do things you don't want to do. There are only a few absolute responsibilities in your life and it sucks when people are willing to sacrifice what they really want for "security" or whatever. Don't let fear dictate what you really want to do. I especially don't think you should let Derek tell you about this stuff. He is a shining example of someone who has made those sacrifices. He'd be great in grad school but he's too scared/confused/intimiated to really go after it. I admire the fact that you work hard to get what you want.
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