My friend told me on Saturday night that he's trying to date me. Which, quite honestly, took me by surprise. I probably should have picked up on some of his I'm-trying-to-date-you hints. Like:
How he found an excuse to call me every single night last week,
Or how he made me cookies, just because I said I liked them,
Or how, when he noticed my chipped nail polish that was a result of running out of nail polish remover, a brand-new bottle of polish remover mysteriously appeared on my doorstep that very afternoon,
Or how I frequently catch him watching me from across the room,
Or how, when I was supposed to go out with him and his roommate, his roommate mysteriously didn't show up,
Or how he repeatedly told me that I am the epitome of womanhood, and how much he loves a woman who "exudes femininity" the way that I do,
Or how every other question he's asked me in the past week is whether or not he is correct in assuming that I am really, truly over my ex-boyfriend,
Or how almost every question he asked me that wasn't about how over my ex-boyfriend I am was about the vision I have for my hypothetical future family,
Or how he called me exactly 30 seconds after I left his house to tell me that he thought I looked great that day,
Or how, when I was watching conference, and was the only person sitting on a couch large enough to seat my institute teacher, his wife, all nine of their children, and quite possibly six additional full-grown men, he sat just close enough to me that he wasn't completely sitting on my lap,
Or how, every time I told him something new about myself, he put his hand on my leg and told me how impressive I am, and how the more he learns about me, the more impressed he is. (Although this one shouldn't necessarily be a sign that he wants to date me. Because I am amazing and impressive, and everyone, regardless of whether or not they're trying to date me, should notice my impressive qualities. Apparently humility isn't on the list, but hey, nobody's perfect.)
I should have picked up on these hints, but I didn't. And they're all probably reasons that I should want to date him. Among others, such as:
If I date him, I will have kissed 3 men in the past year, which would DOUBLE the total number of men I've kissed in my lifetime,
Or because he isn't aware of the existence of this blog, so I can exploit his idiosynchrosies for the amusement of my audience. I frequently write funny stories about my ex-boyfriend, but since he reads this occasionally, instead of publishing, I have to "save as draft" until a later date, when he has completely forgotten about this blog. And I'm always looking for more humorous material.
Or because, although I've never actually tried dating someone that I hadn't' already completely fallen for, my sisters think it would be a great idea. And I do everything my sisters tell me to do.
We'll see...
You've written funny posts about Derek? SHARE, SHARE, SHARE! If he can't take it, then he shouldn't have done it.
ReplyDeleteHe sounds nice, if a little over the top.
He is a bit over the top at times. That's really my one major hangup. But I think I'm going to give it a shot.... I'll keep you all posted.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great site »
ReplyDelete